A critical all-hands where departments realign their multi-cloud strategies, redefine “alignment,” and agree to circle back later. Featuring breakout rooms named after AWS pricing tiers, and a closing keynote titled "Let’s Just Kubernetes It."

Join us as we spend 45 minutes pretending we can “solve bias in AI” with one slide deck and a catered taco bar. Don’t miss the panel on “What Even Is Responsible AI?” moderated by ChatGPT.

A week-long emotional support series for devs still recovering from last year’s move to microservices. Bring your war stories, your loosely coupled architectures, and your regrets. Group therapy optional but encouraged.

Speed-networking meets CI/CD as developers, ops, and security teams are randomly matched to troubleshoot imaginary outages. Bonus points if your partner ghosts you halfway through a Terraform apply.

Celebrate the commit history that shaped our year—for better or worse. Awards include “Most Cryptic Commit Message,” “Biggest Friday Push,” and the prestigious “Oops, Master Merge” Lifetime Achievement badge.

48 hours. One goal: make the login experience “delightful.” We’ll judge you harshly for basic auth, praise you for OAuth 2.0, and disqualify anyone who suggests biometric retina scanning. Again.

Explore new frontiers in putting everything—yes, everything—on the blockchain. From smart toasters to decentralized HR performance reviews, no idea is too implausible. Free mimosas if you say “ledger” three times in a row.

Dust off your Zoom background and prepare for ye olde breakout rooms. Sessions include “How To Turn Your Slack Status Into a Cry for Help” and “From Pajamas to Productivity: Myth or Legend?”

Join us in celebrating the year’s final deploy with champagne, vague product roadmaps, and absolutely no new bugs. Formal wear encouraged. Feature requests will be turned away at the door.

Because it’s never too early to prepare for our AI overlords. This workshop covers how to build rapport with large language models, appropriate offerings for appeasement, and how to write resumes for a post-human economy.